A New Kind of Nihilism...

For me it's more like... nothing means anything. I often, and currently as of right now, get the feeling that my life is entirely meaningless. It's just a series of events strung together which no one will remember, which won't impact anyone, and which don't give me enough to keep me coming back. Like Hamlet once said, one of the three things that keeps me from committing suicide is that I consider it a sin; and I don't have the time to spend eternity in hell.

Secondly, it would probably hurt some of you. I don't want to be mean and heartless and selfish.

Thirdly, I'm too pussified, and I don't want to screw up and live the rest of my life fucked up somehow.

That having been said, life is tiring. It just wears me down, and I often wonder what the point is. Just keep on getting up every morning [or afternoon, as the case may be] to get battered around throughout the day, cling onto my wakingness as I try to get some meaning out of things while talking to people on MSN/message boards until early in the morning and then falling back asleep again.

Eurgh.

What I want, what I really want, is to be someone history remembers for having done something incredible, something that stays in the history textbooks, some kind of jarring photograph that gets burned into the minds of millions of people the day afterward in the news and in the papers, on the internet, I don't know, but I want to be a revolutionary or something. Be on the cover of Time magazine. I don't want to fade into obscurity like everyone else but how do you go about applying for the position of collective-world-paradigm-shifter extraordinaire? You don't. It happens because you're in the right place at the right time, and you do the right thing... and who knows how that would come about. History chooses you, you don't get to apply, and so my life constructs shallow purposes for myself as I while away the time until I'm too old to be an activist and not look like a joke.

Fuck things.

I guess the premium time for shit to happen would be 2018. Fifty years since 1968, which most people agree was the fucking craziest, most rebellious, revolutionary, activist year in centuries. I'd be 29 going on 30, probably holding some shitty job in the city, done university in a degree that won't get me any kind of profession, maybe a G8 summit comes to town or something, I dunno. I'd even like to be hated by most of the world. Viewed as a bad person, most evil, most likely to change the world for the worse, but if I knew I was right in my heart & in my head, and if a few people, here and there, maybe even after I'm dead and gone, look back, read up on me, go, "Damn, he was a genius, a great person, what an inspiration..." it'd be worth it, just for the few that saw the truth, having millions hate me. And I don't mean like Neo-Nazis like Hitler, I mean like the media portrayed me as a monster because I was attacking Corporate America, but in truth I was striking a blow for humanity. So I'd like to have a small "cult" following, if you will, because the best kind of people are the ones who think differently than the majority. So to be truly understood by those who matter most, posthumously or otherwise, would be awesome.

This is the kinda blog post that, I feel, really makes me weird, because how many people would feel like this? How many would say it? Most people want to grow up, get married, a nice job, a house, kids, lead a fulfilling, peaceful life but for me, with my inner attention whore, I want to be world-famous for being different, for being a bad motherfucker with a plan and a Molotov Cocktail, I dunno. Maybe I listen to too much RATM.

EDIT:

I decided, a little late, but to blog for rizzle, so anyway.

Today was weird.

Woke up late, as to be expected, aucune surprise.

Did nothing.

Missed out on an opportunity to go see a movie with Dan.

I had a prophetic dream.

So fucking weird... I don't remember a whole lot, but it was weird, but Tadzeo was in it. For those of you who don't know, Tadzeo was my best or second-best friend for most of my childhood. We were both socially awkward so we were rejected by about everyone but each other. We were real close buds, we spent a lot of time together, sleep overs, watching television, playing Civilization II and just hanging out. He had been going to FACE since Grade 3 but we managed to still be friends. Around high school, however, he started to get popular, got sucked in by the cool kids at FACE, now he had lots of friends, didn't hang around with me as much, we still got together every once in a while but they were rarer. We didn't see eye to eye as often, he got frustrated by me because I was such a goody two-shoes. He started going through girls real fast, two or three girlfriends in a month, I still had none, he lost his virginity last year. Last time I was over at his house was November '03 for his 15th birthday party, I think. I really regret us falling apart but things happen. It really irks me, if you will. Fucking depressing, because he's an awesome guy, really funny, cool to hang out with but he's into the whole party/alcohol/casual sex scene which I despise. Anyway, last night I had a dream, and in it I was fighting a whole lot of people with a hockey stick in an alleyway, and then the fighting paused and he showed up and we hugged, and I was all hyped to see him. Later on in the dream it turned out he was a girl. Not sure how that works. Anyway, I was walking up the street to get milk and I ran into him and his friend, Alex [aka Big Jesus]... It was really depressing because we just talked about meaningless bullshit for a minute or two and then parted ways.

Nothing like reminding me of all the things that could've been. He was wearing the fucking awesomest outfit... I have never seen a guy look so cool. Heh. So that made me really depressed.

Then, nothing happened at all, really. I just kinda did nothing. I d/led a bunch of music though. I'm up to 1.7 GBs in two months. Pretty smooth.

My two songs of the moment: Coheed & Cambria - A Favor House Atlantic and Minor Threat - I Don't Want to Hear It

"...shut your fucking mouth / i don't care what you say / you keep talking / talking everyday / first you're telling stories / then you're telling lies / when the fuck / are you gonna realize / that i don't want to hear it? / know that you're full of shit / i don't want to hear it / know that you're full of shit / i don't want to hear it / know that you're full of shit / oh, shut up..."

and

"...good eye, sniper / here I'll shoot, you run / the words you scribbled on the walls / with the loss of friends you didn't have / i'll call you when the time is right / are you in or are you out? / for them all to know the end of us all / run quick, they're behind us / didn't think we'd ever make it / this close to safety in one piece / now you wanna kill me in the act of what could maybe / save us from sleep and what we are..."


x

Now for that long, extended-type blog post I was talking about...

You know, regular-style.

More than 200 words, if you will.

Si tu voudrais.

My French always feels incorrect, even when it isn't, I don't know. C'est un peu penible.

Anyway, today was more or less eventless.

Caught the early bus, which was cool.

Didn't take any tests, had three consecutive remplaçantes for the last three periods, didn't make out with anyone, etc.

Got back my Econ and Hist marks, 93 and 84 respectively.

I need to step my History test game up.

Rise to meet the challenge, or something.

Get better than 84, for certain.

Anyway, I have a hockey game in about 50 minutes, I need to leave in about 15, should be exhausting, hopefully less so than last time.

Should take up enough time for alla yous to get online and be on msn/reply to me/blog/etc.

Go nuts, I say, but not quite Bill O'Reilly style.

Certainly don't start talkign about vibrators 24/7

Bwahaha. Check the Smoking Gun site.

Peace izzout of stock.

I mean, peace out, sorry.

x

Just for the novelty of it all...

I thought I'd blog from school.

This will be short, but I'll blog when i get home, no worries.

Peace y'all.

x

Forty-seven winks short of the impossible and I'm floating amongst the dead & gone...

How could Math class be so poetic? Who knew?

At any rate, now, along with Chemistry and Mr. Zigby, I have a third pimp, Mr. Zwetkow.

Ugh.

ME FAIL MATH != POSSIBLE!

Yeah, not cool. I'd appreciate at least a pass on the Physics labs, and maybe a pass + better than all my friends so they can burn in Limbo for not having been SciFair partners with me.

Now I'll have to be alone, and my project will sUx0r the penis.

Gahz0rz.

On the, um, good news front [GNF] I aced the Econ test... 28/30... Not too shabby at all.

Maybe my Economics mark will cancel out my Math mark and I'll make honour roll with flying colours!

Of course, then something will have to cancel out my English, French, Chemistry and Physics marks. I don't see that as being physically possible, unless I get 1,000,000,000 % in History.

Who knows, stranger things have happened, like [no I'm not obsessed]

I had a stroke today.

As in, as I was trying not to kill something on the heels of my math failure, and loading and unloading my bad with my locker, Jin walked on by, and stroked me as she passed.

WTF?

As far as I can tell, this is just some "oh-he's-supposed-to-like-me-but-he's-ignoring-me-so-I'll-breach-the-physical-barrier-to-see-what-happens" type thing.

Whatever.

Anyways, poor Them is irritable because D. is away on the Stratford Trip [eSTi] so I won't make any jokes at his expense, especially not about his Math abilities.

*cough*

Heheh.

AAAAAAAAA H MMMMMM

Boy, do I ever need to get my act together...

Realrealbad.

Badrealbad.

Fuckfuckfuck.

I'm lonely, bored, depressed, cynical, in over my head, hating myself, hating lots of other people, awash in a sea of misery, and, sadly, listening to Creed.

Yes, I know, it's a pretty sad situation.

Won't someone out there save me?

xalex

Read between the lines of what's fucked up and everything's alright

Or, make that nothing.

Nothing's alright.

This weekend has been piss.

Pure, straight, unadulterated urine on alexei.

FUCKING 'ELL.

BLOODY WANKING SHITE.



You have no idea how badly i need respite from this trash. Oh it's been so bad... gah.

My cousins and aunt came over. They weren't so bad but they added nothing and were a chore to deal with. I got a good argument on abortion in, three decent chess games, and I played a little bit of basketball.

No one was online, ever, until today, and even then it wasn't that great [mostly because no Them X(] and the aftermath of the Sandy's Party fiasco resulted in a severely depressing conversationg with Dehui. My parents are getting after me about getting a job, I forgot a whole lot of fucking shit at school, including my science fair sheet, which is due tomorrow and has to be signed by my parents, not to mention I don't have a partner because the rest of BC screwed me over [You have no idea how much i ache inside...] and I'll have to study for my physics test throughout the day. This weekend has been mostly an exercise in "let's-see-how-much-we-can-make-alex-hate-himself-o-rama" whoop de fucking doo ...

Man, the design of this site is lacking.

Too bad you can't be more liberal in your choosing of layouts and design your own to an extent. Maybe a switch to greatestjournal is in order? My problem with that is that Blogger rocks GJ's socks.

We'll see.

Anydangway.

So my profile is updating again... I'm averaging 310 words a post or so. Pretty slick.

I said, a few hours ago, that the mechanics had changed. I'm still convinced of that. Here is the story.

"...push the envelope, watch it bend..."

In this case the envelope = Dehui's patience with my antics.

Apparently last night, everything I did in relation to Jin was == an enormous faux pas, and that now that they've told her that I tentatively like her (I hope that's what they told her at any rate) she's puzzled and/or weirded out by my lack of visible feelings toward her. This is mostly because this kind of stuff has happened before and I don't want to make the same old mistakes - so I'm cool with making a whole set of new ones, I guess, in this circumstance. In the past generally Alex's approach into something like this was to go super-emo, and pay attention to only Jin, really until everyone else knew about it and that put extra strain on me - and to boot I had no chance anyway, so it was just a great big ugly mess. Secondly, like Sandee said, Jin has an attitude which I don't want to run afoul of, and I certainly don't want to presume that she tolerates and/or accepts my semi-feelings for her. So lacking confidence and cold, hard facts on the matter, I do nothing. Forgive me if this sounds logical, I tend to think things over a lot.

Anyway, I've got lots of time, and, barring her getting asked out by anyone else [though come to think of it... that's a distinct possibility... that sort of mistake has tripped me up in the past. though i doubt i could have made much of a difference had i taken a different chain of action.] my chance, or chances, will come, and depending on how this unfolds, things will happen. Should be interesting. I'd like to invite you all along for the ride. Cordially, even, too.

I wanted to talk to Dehui about this beforehand [before the blog post, if you folla me] because I figured maybe some info from her would clarifiy matters, and maybe make her annoyed, which is always amusing [i kid, i kid, stop hitting me] being that she talked to both Jin and Sandy about the whole mess last night behind [literally] my back.

So it seems that the success, if that's what you call it, of the poetry experience, was diminished noticeably by my screw-ups last night. I don't think the middle finger over my shoulder helped either.

And got heim Brian and Ray were idiots. Oi. My bleeding eyes, and ears, ugh.

Anyway, stay hip and happening folks, I'm off to listen to some better music than yours. If San, D., or Them reads this, and wants to comment on the situation, hit me up email-style.

-*

Aight so things got weirded up last night...

Majorly.

Well, maybe not so much.

But I think they dynamic's changed.

I'll get back to you later, when I've contemplated the matter some more.

Don't catch feelings.

Peace.

(A)

O Irony of ironies...

Jin's only [so far] email to me in my Gmail account was, guess which number, that one that makes people laugh, that one special number which Them's msn name referenced, that's right, no deletions, no insertions, Jin's first email to me was email # 69 to my Gmail account. 69. That's right, 69. You're reading that right. Not 68, or 59, or any of those non-significant digits, it was 69.

That, folks, treasured blog-readers, is what I call irony, proving once and for all that Osama bin Laden and his cowardly terrorists failed to kill the unkillable despite killing a whole lot of people. I've always had a problem with calling them innocent, because let's be real, no one is. I hate to smack you in the face like reality, Raine Maida, but we aren't, we aren't all innocent. No one == perfect, thus no one == innocent. If you mean innocent of any crime committed against the terrorists, well, in their eyes clearly existing was a crime thus making them criminals and therefore not innocent. So as much as my heart goes out to all the 3-years-and-change dead, and anyone who's read into the archives a bit, or has talked to me in the past will know, I'm not one to make fun of the whole mess, I do play devil's advocate a lot.

Anyway, as I was saying, it's ironic. "What could it mean," you might ask, "is fate spitting in his face and laughing at him? Or is it proof of things to come?" Are you being realistic and saying, "Alex you're reading way too far into this, it's just a coincidence and the fact that you're making such a big deal of it is basically just downright creepy."? If you answered yes to any of the above, please take a moment to read Jin's poem, and then read mine, and then agree with me when I say her poem spanks mine as hard as, well, I won't go there, but suffice to say, she thinks mine is bettar and she is clearly on teh crack.

--------------------------------

I had regularly studied the bridge of his nose

Or his brows when we spoke face to face.

Never did I look into those piercing eyes…

Afraid I would be scrutinized down to every inch of skin,

flesh, not one fine hair undetected.

Scared to be transfixed in a deathly gaze.



He told me that our eyes are the windows to our souls

and I would eventually take that step to look him straight,

eye to eye,

but not until he gains my confidence.



At last, I did, but only to uncover my silhouette.

However, I discovered a whole new world of colors

once I reached in deeper, as I was grasping for what it was at the time.

knowledge? Or maybe simply just to understand.



His eyes were a sweet honey brown when he was mellow,

A forest green when he was enraged

And hazel when he smiled,

laughed,

and cried.



I do not look anymore.

There’s nothing more to see.

They are merely impenetrable bloodshot spheres,

of emptiness,

obscurity.



His lashes no longer meet…

------------------------

Now compare that piece of brilliance, a boring old Danish, if you will, with this delicious doorstop of an overrated poem:

____________________________

Lying, sprawled, in the dry sand grass,
Me and her whisper sweet somethings,
Or whatever they are called, into each
Others' ears; time, unending, passes us
By, uncaring, we smile with gawky looks
About us, and twirl the golden stalks
Betwixt our love-clumsied fingers, sighing
With the breeze, in perfect harmony with
Each other and Nature. Suddenly,
Clouds come rolling by on roads of
Tension in the air, they expand menacingly
Towards us, and begin their discharge.
Mighty is the storm, but we lie here in
Defiance; acting as though nothing had
Changed. The orage, enraged, doubles
Its efforts, attempting to drive us to shelter
Ourselves, but, persecuted, we resist.
Then lightning strikes, and everything
Is white.

_______________________________

That's right. Mine sucks, just like, well I won't go there either, but [Them, my pants are *on*] the point is she's clearly, as I said before, on crack. Which, of course, would explain both her lack of sense and her poetical skills, to some extent.

Now upon reading those two poems, a few conclusions must be drawn.

1) They're both about a guy and a girl. This could meanL 1) Our future together is assured. 2) We both have one -track minds, being teenagers, and single. 3) There just aren't that many poetry subjects out there anyway, and we just independently wrote on similar topics. Nothing special.

Secondly, now that we've both seen a sampling of each other's work, and think that it's better than our own, we have a good start to a healthy professional and personal relationship, known as Artistic Mutual Respect, or AMR. Any similarities to the word amour mentioned here will get you killed on the spot. We can now appraise other people's A&L submissions with more confidence because we clearly have the others' respect, if somewhat misguided.

Things are looking up.

Thank you Sandy.

Also, I have been informed [by Them, no less] that Dehui may or may not have tried to set me up with her this afternoon.

You'll have to fill me in on that.

So, after that whole blog post about Jin,

I think I need some alcohol. And sunlight.

XP

a

newsFLASH

They're like hot flashes except without the gender and age discrimination.

Anyway.

Bleuhh.

You know you're in high french when a 92 is fifth-quintile stuff.

Not that I'm complaining. It's what I deserved. But it is a little depressing.

Also, you know you're in Physics, first term, when you get a 60 on the homework and that's third-quintile material.

Bwahahaha. Wou got a 20%. That makes me feel better about myself.

And I think I did well on the Chemisty pop quiz.

But not so hot on the Economics test.

Sandee was right, again, I guess.

So, after that very marks-based intro.

I continue. A little further down the spiral. A little less inhibited. And I keep going.

Gliding along the surface
Gyrating, revolving
I can barely see through shutter eyes
But I can feel your presence

And who
Should I
Come across
But you

The shadow over
And behind me
Shades you over too
It took a while but now I see

Now who
Should I
Come across
But you

Gliding along the surface
Gyrating, revolving
I can barely see through shutter eyes
But we can dance right through this

Man, Lateralus is so damn good.

yAhweh

Remember, whatever, it seems like forever ago...

So the song of the moment is definitely Green Day - Whatsername.

Listen to it by any means you can.

Just do it.

Now, then, down to brass tacks, on to business, get your rear in gear, etc.

Well, I'm not really sure how to classify this week. It's been majorly rollercoaster, I guess would be the best description.

My lack of sleep is starting to fuck me over.

This is clearly clear.

And it sucks.

I need to get some artsy-fartsy shit together for tomorrow.

Must... submit... to A&L...

Which reminds me, I have to print out my anonymous poem.

Further down the spiral, as Trent Reznor once said, Jin != going anywhere.

I wonder if this job is actually going to have me working together with her at all, like in the yearbook room or something at some point, because she sure as hell isn't coming on MSN, ever, and I don't want to be all stalker-ish and start emailing/calling her up etc. because that's just weird.

So I guess I'll just let things simmer, if you will, while I try to get the rest of my life decent looking. Looks like I'ma need the Lord for this one, not that I don't always, but I tend to forget, like the bad [*ahem*] Christian that I am. Prayer set in effect, what what.

Anyway, for all of you who were just weirded out by that display of faith, well, fuck off. As Them told me to say so determinedly.

So on the grad noms side of things, I'm getting nominated, so far as I can tell, for four categories: Most artistic, should've gone out [with more than one person, no less], most evil and, of course, the ever-present worst jokes.

All of which are probably true.

I'd laugh if I was on the ballot twice for should've gone out.

That would be weird, and would prove that our grade is just a bunch of meddling wankers taking the piss.



Seriously.

Anyhow.

Time to get the art skills going.

I gotta go.

"...and in the darkest night / if my memory serves me right /i'll never turn back time / forgetting you but not the time..."

A

...and then it hit me...

Okay, so nothing in particular, but I figured today would be a relaxed-thoughts post.

So, here goes.

Man, I want to win Grad noms for something. The prestige! The honour! The glory and the pizza! Well, maybe not the pizza. But anyway. This is like my life's goal, along with passing Chemistry this term. Speaking of which, I should probably get around to filling mine out. I'll include all of you somewhere, somehow, probably, if you deserve it.

My lyrics are going enh lately. It's kinda sad that the best thing I have to submit to A&L. Of course that's probably because it's a poem and the others are lyrics. Also, I'll need to get my drawing game more on point. Jin said something about doing one together, and I said I was going to submit something on my own anyway but I'd be down with that. In retrospect it looks like I kinda turned her off the idea. I'll have to ask tomorrow. Not that we'd have much time to do it anyway. Shit. Fuck. Let's hope I didn't blow my first chance to actually get to know her.

Anyway.

So American Idiot is getting more skilled. It definitely gets my props. I did my French oral presentation today. Apparently I didn't suck terribly. That's definitely good. Mr. Zigby's mean though >< I hate lunch detentions. Not that I've ever had one before. But the one today really screwed up my flow, if you will. I didn't get it back until I listened to some Green Day on the way to the bus. That was cool.

In related news, I have to get Sandy a present for Saturday night. Holla atcha boy if you want anything. If not I'm warning you it might suck. Just being frank with you and all.

Dan's probably laughing right now.

Anyway. I can't wait until the Audioslave and Tool albums drop - and the U2 one. But what I'm really looking forward to is ZdlR's solo album. Which is not on the near horizon, I think.

Crapz0rz.

><

Which brings me to my next point: I've bought more CD's this year than most other years combined. I'm not sure if this is because now I care about music more, there's more good stuff coming out, I just have the cash, or what, but I bought 7 CDs this year. And we're still only in October. I'll probably buy the U2 one, which will make 8.

Or, two thirds of my CD collection. And that's not counting the ones I don't like anymore.

So hennywayss.

My profile finally updated yesterday. I'm averaging about 303 words a post over 48 posts.

SKIIIIILLZ.

So comment, mofos, because I told you to.

Do it.

"...i beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies / this is the dawning of the rest of our lives / this is our lives on holiday..."

*

-a.

So I got American Idiot and Thirteenth Step today...

And both are unbearably skilled.

Not much time though so I'll just leave you with this:

"...though i ran into you down on the street / the it turned out to only be a dream..."

@

*

Well, good news, good news indeed.

After my polemic blog post yesterday, all the Nazi punks who were reading my blog fucked off. Pretty skilled. There were two of them, apparently.

Punks.

Anyway. Down to brass tacks, to the bread and butter of this blog post: *takes off hockey helmet*

I got beef.

That's right, beef.

You read it right.

I double dare you to be weirded out right now.

I got beef.

And I don't mean meat coming from a cow, neither.

I mean, I got beef. I got a problem. I got a bone to pick, to stick with butcher-language, with life.

Something's stuck in my craw, if you will.

This is my beef:

There are just too many fucking people in this life.

And because there are so damn many fucking people the world over, populating nearly every damn last inch of the planet, something happens.

You know what happens?

I'll tell you what happens.

The amount of awesome, and I mean fucking awesome, incredible, special, one-of-a-kind, blink-and-you-miss-'em, jaw-dropping, heart-stopping people in this life of ours, goes way way up.

There are tons of 'em.

Millions, even.

Even a one in a million person, in this life, is pretty common. Think about it, with 6-and-a-quarter-billion people on this planet, there are about 6,250 one-in-a-million people in the world right now.

That may not sound like a lot but try fitting 6-and-a-quarter-thousand geniuses, thespians, artists, philantropists, musicians, mathematicians, kind souls, philosophers, etc. into your living room, and you'll find you're about a small city short of space.

And that's just the one-in-a-million people.

Think, in our lives, all the people we pass by every day that we'll quite possibly never see again, that we'll never talk to, who could be practically soulmates, or, I dunno, become our best friend if given 30 seconds of conversation, people who could change our perspectives forever, that we'll never ever get to sit down and chat with.

It's maddening, is what it is.

So that's your thought for the day, and think about it, and think about it good.

Alex

Nazi Punks Fuck Off!

Just thought I'd point out that this is an anti-racist blog, and that any Nazi punks reading it should kindly fuck off.

That having been said, and all points to Jello Biafra, here's a blog entirely for Them. Because I said I would do it. And he needs tomsehing to read in the morning. That's right, I said tomsehing. Figure out what it means for yourself, punk.

So, I present to you, before I actually finish the blog off, a survey, obtained from San-san, that I took. Read away, and find out all about me and maybe even yourself.


Nicknames: Alexei, Lexy, Manners, Manley, Awexei, etc.
Sex: Not yet.
Age: 16
Birthday: 16/09/88
Birth place: Montreal
Zodiac Sign: Dragon, I think. w00t.

Favourites:
Colours: Black, red, navy, white.
Animals: Wolves, and hell, most any big carnivors.
Anime Characters: Sasuke, Naruto, Kakashi, Vegeta, Cell
Actresses: On the strength of looks alone, Natalie Portman and Keira Knightley
Actors: Um, Tom Cruise,
Movies: Princess Mononoke, The Matrix
Types of music: Metal, punk, rock, ska, hip hop/rap, some mainstream.
Singers: Bob Marley, everyone else is in groups, I guess ZdlR on his own.
Bands/Groups: Tool, APC, RATM, AFI, Audioslave, NOFX, Dead Kennedys, Metallica, Minor Threat, Green Day, The Beatles, AC/DC, U2
CDs: RATM - RATM, RATM - Evil Empire, Tool - Lateralus, Audioslave - Audioslave
Love songs: In A Little While - U2, Love Song - APC (Live The Cure cover)
Breakup songs: Tool - Schism
Happy songs: None XP No seriously I don't listen to happy songs. I just don't.
All time favorite songs: Know Your Enemy - RATM, The Grudge - Tool, Light My Way - Audioslave, The Noose - APC
Books: Joshua Then & Now, Barney's Version, 1984
Authors: Mordecai Richler
Video games: None
Computer games: Civilization 2 (soon to be 3, methinks)
Foods: Pizza
Ice creams: Coconut, ginger, banana, stuff like that. I had some awesome blueberry in Halifax once.
Cookies: Ginger snaps, what what.
Veggies: Carrots & Green peppers
Fruits: Apples, peaches, strawberries, raspberries, etc.
Candies: Skittles, Starbursts
Beverages: Vanilla Pepsi, Root Beer, Orange Crush
Cereals: Honey Bunches of Oats (with Almonds), Honey Nut Cheerios, Apple Cinnamon Cheerios, Vector, Just Right, etc.
Music videos: The Leaving Song, Pt II - AFI
Gum: Peppermint
Pizza toppings: Pepperoni, mushrooms, green peppers, green olives if possible
Fast food joints: McDonald's, I don't have the strength of mind to go to more than one fast food joint. I only go once or twice a year anyhow.
Fast food meals: Big Macs and Chicken McNuggets, wow I'm such a fatwhore. Heh.
Pig out foods: Pizza, w00t.
Restaurant: Copoli, what what. Maybe SM Pizza.
Outfits: Stuff that goes okay with my awesome shoes.
Stores: Foot Locker
Sports: Hockey, Basketball, soccer, hacky sack!
Athletes: Patrick Roy, Lebron James, Vladimir Guerrero
Breakfast foods: Cereal
Shampoos: Um... Pears Aloe Vera? Shit, I don't know
Magazines: Adbusters, Hour and Mirror... hell, even Exclaim if they count. I don't think they do though.

Love Life
Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: Not currently, no.
If so, who are they?: No one.
Do you love them?: Hell no.
How long have you been dating?: One year and 31 days.
Do you have a crush?: Who doesn't?
Would you rather be single or taken right now?: Probably taken, but then the grass is always greener...
How many people have you dated this past year?: None.
How many people have you kissed in your life?: 1
How many people have you said "I love you" to and meant it?: 0
If you didn't mean it, why did you say it?: Because I'm an idiot.
Have you ever had a hard time getting over someone?: Yes.
Are you friends with your ex/exes?: Ali doesn't consider herself my ex, so no.
Have you ever cheated on someone?: No
Have you ever been cheated on?: Not that I know of.
What's the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for you?: Um... obliged with a goodbye kiss?
What do you look for in your ideal mate?: Looks, mind, musical taste, (for Them: race! XP)
Biggest Turn-ons: Oh, if she can impress the hell out of me in any way, that works. Most people can't.
Turn-offs: All sorts of things. Mostly just being ordinary. I like crazy, different people.
Best quote to sum up love: Love sucks.

Morals/Beliefs
What religion are you?: Theist with Anglican Christian leanings.
Do you got to church regularly?: Not lately, to my dismay.
What do you think happens when you die:? That depends on whether or not you're going to hell.
Do you believe in God?: Moreso than many.
Satan?: Yes. He's annoying.
Angels?: Yes, but not conventionally.
Heaven?: Yes, I hope so.
Hell?: Yeah.
Are you a virgin?: And proud, or embarrassed.
What do you think of abortion?: Pro-life unless rape is involved.
Suicide?: Natural selection at work.
War?: Ditto XP okay, no seriously war sucks the penis.
Pop music?: Oh God, make it stop.

What Did You Do...
Last weekend?: Nothing I can remember.
Yesterday?: School.
Your last birthday?: Nothing, but some strange people showed up at my house in the morning though.
New Years Eve?: I think I was over at my friend's place. There was a party for all ages. Thrown by his dad and step-mom.
Valentines Day?: Hated the world.
Easter?: Church, what what.
4th of July?: Did fuck-all.
Halloween?: Sat at home in fear of the whole thing. Stupid shit fucking holiday.
Thanksgiving?: Attempted to be thankful?
Christmas Eve?: Waited.
Christmas Day?: Was materialistic.

What do you think you'll be doing in...
A week from now?: A&L / schoolwork / I don't know.
A month from now?: No clue.
A year from now?: Fucking around in CEGEP.
5 years from now?: Dead, homeless, jailed or famous. Please not boring.
10 years from now?: Um, a rock singer? Are we being realistic, or hopeful here?
20 years from now?: Hopefully with someone, and no kids.
50 years from now?: Being cooler than most 66 year olds.

Friends
Nicest: Dan, I guess. Dehui gets an honourable mention XP
Bitchiest: Me!
Prettiest: Dehui, I guess. That's being objective, hey Dan, don't hurt me.
Hottest?: San-san XP
Best eyes: That's kinda creepy.
Best hair: Um...
Biggest tease: Me
Rudest: Koj!
Shyest: Awi, hah.
Loudest: Dehui
Smartest: Ali
Blondest: San-san! XP
Drama Queen: Me, far and away.
Biggest Flirt: Me again.
Tallest: Dan, you fokker.
Shortest: Um... toss-up between San-san and Dehui I thinks.
Most likely to become a model?: Jackie I guess, I dunno. She's got the height factor going for her.
Most likely to be rich?: Probably Dan.
Most talented: Ali... Grrr.
Craziest?: Me. Dehui too.
Weirdest?: If by weird, you mean awesome, Sachi.
Biggest Druggie?: No one. I got the straight edge, if you will ><
Thuggest?: Hahahaha... me.
Girliest?: San-san or me. ><
Most caring?: Dan, hah.
Most independent?: Also Dan.

This or That
Chocolate or Vanilla?: Kiwi, you fucker.
Mom or Dad?: Dad.
Blonde or Brunette?: Black hair > brown, but both > blonde so brunette.
Spicy or Minty gum?: Both.
Nsync or Backstreet Boys?: The Beatles
The Beatles or The Rolling Stones?: Bob Dylan
Boys or Girls?: Depends on what for.
France or England?: France so far. England hasn't put a bid in yet.
Cookies or Cake?: Nanaimo bars.
Flower or Candy?: Depression.
Doctors or Dentist?: Psychiatrist, right Dan/Dehui/Ali?

Ever Been Called...
Dumb?: Mmhm.
Retarted?: Mmhm.
Ugly?: Mmhm.
Hot?: Mmhm.
Fat?: Mmhm. People are weird, I guess.
Anorexic?: Mmhm.
A waste of space?: Not yet but it's coming...
Useless?: Maybe, can't remember.
Sexy?: Sexei, yes.
Smelly?: Mmhm. A common refrain.
A Slut?: No, surprisingly XP
Beautiful?: Nope.
Smart?: Once or twice.
Quiet?: I get that all the time. I should try speaking my mind more often, people say.
Boring?: Ali...
A Bitch?: By Ms. Lang, no less. Okay, no but still.
Rebel?: Hahahaha yes.
Conceited?: Of course. At least, I hope so.

Currently
What are you wearing?: Basketball shorts, boxers, a black tee and my Akron's Finest trucker.
Who are you talking to?: Well, San-san before she signed out.
How is the weather?: Dark.
What are you listening to?: Seventeen Seconds - The Cure
What/Who are you thinking about?: This survey.
What are you eating/drinking?: Nada.
What are you looking forward to?: Not much. My life is pretty bleak.
What are you dreading?: Tests, and the responsibilities of A&L.
How are you feeling?: Blahed.
How is your hair?: Too short to be sexei. ;_;
What time is it?: 1:40 am EST

So, all that having been said, um, today sucked but oh well. I didn't really do anything at all.

I, uh, wish I had a point of view to extrapolate on, or to expound, some awesomeness to exude, but not really.

So I leave you with this:

con·tin·u·um    ( P )  Pronunciation Key  (kn-tny-m)
n. pl. con·tin·u·a (-tny-) or con·tin·u·ums

n : a continuous nonspatial whole or extent or succession in which no part or portion is distinct of distinguishable from adjacent parts

And this is how you spell quaaludes. Not qualuudes.

"...i'm a street-walking cheetah with a heart full of napalm..."

A l e x t r e m e

\m/

*

Engineered

Nothing to do on a friday night and i'm in the mood for nihilism
Lie around out of whack as i contemplate my very own commuschism
Watch the fundamental breakdown in slow motion on national television
Laugh at your idiocy while behind my back i practice self-deprecation

Yeah, I engineered this whole mess on my own
Let he who is without sin throw the first stone
Try to knock me off this motherfucking throne
While I tell you that you're gonna
Burn, burn, yes you're gonna burn,
Burn, burn, yes you're gonna burn,
Burn, burn, yes you're gonna burn,
Burn, burn, yes you're gonna burn!

Engines ignite, mechanical animals as they explode in a moment
Your window closes and the fire spreads as you try to recuperate; own it
Despite your clear lack of understanding you press on and you know I won't stop you
But if you fall don't get mad when you die because sorry babe but I don't got you

Yeah, I engineered this whole mess on my own
Let he who is without sin throw the first stone
Try to knock me off this motherfucking throne
While I tell you that you're gonna get owned...

'Cause you know they call me the, uh, the engineer
Now you got a voice in your ears to put to your fears

Cause you're gonna
Burn, burn, yes you're gonna burn,
Burn, burn, yes you're gonna burn,
Burn, burn, yes you're gonna burn,
Burn, burn, yes you're gonna burn!



So life is good. And not a wrong window moment at all.

I love you all.

Time for some new music, methinks.

"...'cause we want it all..."

*

I was born to rage against 'em...

*awesome riff*

In all seriousness, however, this is feeling particularly true at the moment, what with me sitting on some good lyrics [somewhere under the surface, I think] and after all the events of the week have left me feeling like Tybalt, or maybe some crime lord, I dunno, but the point is, I've got lots of under-exploited cheap teen angst waiting to explode.

Good thing hockey season starts soon!

Heh. Anyway. Today was full of things that were almost super-awesome but not quite. Cases in point, Chemistry, lunch, Math, Physics and the prefect partay after school. Some of you may know what the heck I'm talking about here. Others [you're in the majority, maybe, depending on how many people still read my blog and if they'll read this] won't and so much the better I guess. But you can probably see how this would be frustrating.

I got to escape my French oral for yet another day. This class will be the death of me yet, what with my nervous anxiety both putting a strain on my heart and my attempts to divert my attention by hurting myself. I should really put a stop to that nonsense. I don't want to end up a cutter, or suicidal, or anything. An ounce of prevention is worth at least a coupla grams of dope, or maybe a pound of cure, depending on if you're a customs agent or anyone else.

Anyway, today I'm going to download punk. Lots of punk. I don't have a varied enough punk song collection, and I need to get some Dead Kennedys back into my stream.

In further more or less unrelated though probably not news, um, crap, I have absolutely nothing to say. Looks like I have no life outside of school.

Yet. Heh.

"...lock the door, kill the light / no one's coming home tonight / the sun beats down and don't you know? / all our lives are growing cold / they bring news that must get through / to build a dream for me and you / locked in a place where no one goes / they ask no quarter, they have no quarter / lock the door, kill the light / no one's coming home tonight / it's getting colder / it's getting colder / it's getting colder / it's getting colder / it's getting colder / it's getting colder / it's getting colder / locked in a place where no one goes..."

I know, I know...

I didn't post yesterday.

I'm sorry, I was sick, you jerks.

Not too sick to see the Expos get raped by the Marlins, but still.

Also, I got sidetracked by an unfortunate incident with my internet connection.

I'll let my parents tell you about that one.

Anydangwaytizzle, as, um, Strong Bad, if he was me, would say, today sucked royally, as many of you already know, on many different fronts. There were bright spots but on the whole the day was != cool.

On a plus note, I made a good fiscal decision today, even if I only got 8/10 on the Econ test... hahaha Them knows what I'm talking about.

I'll probably have to do my French oral tomorrow but thankfully I'm not stressing yet.

That'll change.

I need anger management... I have so much pent-up hostility towards myself. I can only imagine what it'll look like if ever I get like, I dunno, a 75 average this term or something like that.

God forbid things get so bad. I think I'm more in control of myself than that.

I think.

Anyway, I gotta wrap this up.

-a.

*

My profile are teh suck, majordomo, sigh.

It shows me as having, liek, 32 posts. This one is going to be my 42nd for all of you keeping track if you are that's a little stalkerish and if you're also a guy like me then that is teh gay.

Soooo.

Take a deep brizzeath of your izzair, I went out on a limb and bought American Idiot, Thirteenth Step and Civilization III Game of the Year Edition for Mac from Amazon.ca

Total came to 103.50 with tax and free shipping.

Should be here sometime before October, or maybe November.

If possessions made you cool, I'd be out-cooling you all by several kilowatts right now. You'd all have to wear shades. And even if you bought Oakleys you couldn't out-cool me.

But, they don't. Thus this leaves me an over-possessified lunatic. (I think.)

Right now I have teh cizzold and it no likes me. And I reciprocate its lack of harmonious feelings by [bai!] hating its guts with an intense fervour and passion matched only by my love of minute felines and music that's better, heavier and more hardcore than yours.

Not to mention requires more talent.

So hennywayz, after the numerous social breakdowns ensconced into the grand fabric of today, Dan labelled me socially handicapped, or at least socially inept, which under Chapter 3B, Paragraph 42, line 67 of the Quebec Regional, Municipal and Social Bylaws Handbook 1.5 [2002-2003 edition] states that I get the parking space least close to anyone good looking, popular, talented or otherwise awesome.

Aww.

As well, things are all quiet-like [I can be the quietest mouse!] on the Jinstern front. Seems she's intent on keeping our relationship entirely professional, or at least, arts-and-litsional, I dunno. Maybe she just never comes on MSN. We'll see what happens when we're actually forced to work together. Whatever.

Anyhow. I got some good lyrics [relatively speaking] off my chest today so that was some good shit, and I'm be goin' the the Hexpos game tomorra night.

"Coool," you should be saying right now. "I totally envy you, Alex," you should be saying right now. And if you're of the female persuasion, "Let's make out." Or if you're more diversified in your chromosomation, "Let's high-five."

This is, despite its inherent props-deserving nature, starting to drag on, and I have a curfew, er, bedtime, that I want to be in bed by, which is 11:59 PM EST.

So I'll leave you all with this:

"...i am one of those melodramatic fools / neurotic to the bone, no doubt about it / sometimes i give myself the creeps / sometimes my mind plays tricks on me / it all keeps adding up / i think i'm cracking up / am i just paranoid or am i just stoned?..."

Hey! Tomorrow's Wednesday!

No it isn't.

Just thought I'd share that interesting bit of trivia with y'all.

Today was and will forever be known as Green Day Day, or just GD-Day for short. Maybe even G-Day would suffice. Like D-Day and VE-Day, except more musical and less deadly.

Today, I missed church again. Woke up at 9:32, fell back asleep soon after, woke up around 12, and start my homework at 2 or so.

I'm done the writing part more or less. Need to memorize it and refine some of the ugly bits. Stupid Prachar better give me a 90 or something. I can't afford to keep getting 60s.

Gahz0rz to the max.

I called Jin up today. It was a bit awkward, but I was able to joke a bit and not seriously alienate her. Now she knows that she has an email in her inbox, and maybe I can get a reply eventually, and the communication barrier will be breached forever. Heh. Breach. Anyway, I have an awesome idea for a submission, or maybe part of the opening two pages of A&L. I think Sandy said she was doing those pages though. We'll see, I'ma try and change that though. Me & teh Jinster need more input.

Anyhowdangtizzle, I'm fervently awaiting me cashing my cheques and why the fuck am I waiting anyway? I'm thinking of ordering American Idiot, The War on Errorism, Thirteenth Step and Civilization III Game of the Year Edition for Mac from Amazon.ca. $108.96 and free shipping. The fact that I can afford this and pay off the last of my debts too is teh pwnz0rz.

Fiscal responsibility, what what. I only wish I could get meself a pair of AJ4 CG Retros.

In other news, nothing much happened today. I can't wait until the U2, Audioslave, Tool and ZdlR albums drop, as well as the (maybe) 2/3 concert week in early November, and the AZL2s on the 6th of 11.

Figure that out, fuckers.

"...do you have the time / to listen to me whine / about nothing and everything all at once?..."

Rock, rock on.

-a.

*

How to Assemble an Atomic Bomb

Well, yesterday and today, heck, the whole Ottawa trip sUx0r3d the big one one one etc.

I mean, I got to miss school. Which would've been good except apparently school was both good and bad so I don't know.

It was good for Ali, but bad for Them, and I care for each of you, so it's divisible.

Heh.

I emailed the poster idea off, but no reply on the near horizon, I don't know how religious Jin is with computers, and I doubt it's as much as I am, so I can probably expect no reply until Sunday afternoon or something, unless I call her. Egg as tibia, if you will.

Anyway, while I was on the Ottawa fiasco, I rode the bus both there and back trying not to talk to my mom because when I'm in a cramped space like a bus seat I'm not comfortable enough to talk... I try to just retreat into the music until we get off. But she gets bored and needs to converse. Ugh.

Then, there, the dinner sucked royally, I wasn't really comfortable with my cousins for some reason, and I usually am, and they left before I woke up.

On the plus side, I got to watch two awesome movies: Princess Mononoke, my favourite movie of all time (#100/250) and Pulp Fiction, which was awesome^2 (#15/250)... and I saw the video for Green Day - American Idiot, which made me download the song, want to buy the album, and actually consider going with Dan to the concert at the Bell Centre (Nov. 4 for those of you who care). So it wasn't a total failure.

On the other side of things, I had an awesome MSN convo with Ali tonight, and I didn't start my French, which I should have but now it's too late because I've got church tomorrow and I have to go for once.

I can't remember the last time I did.

Kinda sad.

In other news, though, I balanced the budget.

As Them could tell you.

I haven't talked to Dehui or Nathalie in about 40 hours though.

Onoooooo.

And I have to sell chocolates bah.

Anyway,

"...well maybe I'm the fuckhead america / i'm not a part of a redneck agenda / now everybody do the propaganda / and sing along in the age of paranoia..."

------------------------------------

"...rock / rock on..."

-a.

As we / move into two-thousand-four /

At my aunt's house in Ottawa...
As we / move into ninety-two / still in a room without a view...

Okay, so bad rip-off of Rage, but hey, that's me.

From what Them told me, his day sucked, and D.'s did kinda too. The rest of you, I don't know.

I hope y'all did okay, wherever you were.

I'm chilling up here in O-town [heh] with my aunt and cousins, just watched Prinncess Mononoke for the second time (O_O) I fucking love that movie. It's, and this is decisive, my favourite movie of all time as of now.

It r0x0rz my b0x0rz harder than anyone alive.

O_O

Anyway, I need some real, non-breakfast McDonald's soon. I'm hungry, San^2 style.

I'll catch you all later.

"...drop the a u t o l o g i c (go!)(go!)(go!)(go!)(go!)(go!)(go!)(go!)(go!) ..."

-a.

*

How to Fail a Physics Lab Report

Ugh. Well, as you can tell by the title, we failed the lab report before even handing it in... the good news I guess is that apparently everyone else is going to fail, and that our failure is not entirely or even mostly my fault. It's as much my fault as anyone else's in my group, and Mr. Zigby's en prime for not being there, the asshole.

Tomorrow I show up, with my lab report, chat up the peeps, have breakfast, draw my diagrams, hand it to Sandy, etc. and head to Ottawa on the bus with my mom && my iPod.

w00t. I get to stay with my cousins while my mom & aunt have bonding [not bondage, you sickos] time somewhere in the nearby forests, canoeing. I think. Not too clear on the plans.

Anyway, what that translates to is lots of talking, watching movies & tv, playing video games, eating junk food and staying up to all hours.

Should be pretty fun.

I get back, Saturday night or maybe Sunday morning, I gotta work bigtime on my French project, memorizing, writing, etc. and it's gonna sux0r. Oh well. I need a good mark on this, I'm running like 62% in French right now. I think Prachar wants to die whenever she looks over and sees me laughing at my own unabated idiocy.

Stupidity makes me vociferous, you see, of my own volition, but I'm magnanimous and I only laugh instead of shouting the fuck out of everyone.

Today I d/led a shitload of songs again, mostly ones I had beforehand but one new one, Autologic. Got into meaningful convos with Dan & San so that was cool.

Butttttt, and I stress the 't's because they're in the middle of water and therefore under constant pressure changes because water heats up and cools down so fast and so the particles start speeding up and slowing down like crazy all the time.

I failed the Physics Lab. >< ;_;

Ouin.

Rage Against The Machine - Autologic

G'nite, ciao, see you in 7 hours for breakfast at the Golden Arches.

I love y'all.

-a.

*

How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb, Part II

Natheeng is happening to me lately. Nothing new is happening. Nothing to talk about. No new girlfriends, or lyrics, no new jobs or insights, no new epiphanies or acquaintances or friends. I barely even have a new song of the day.

Rage Against The Machine - Darkness

However, I do have some new monies. It seems that I got 110 dollars in the mail today, from my aunt & grandma, by way of birthday presents.

I can now entirely pay off my debt to my parents and buy my computer game and have a bit of spending cash left over. I do however, have a history thing to write soon. So I will leave you with nothing, or natheeng, else in this blog post.

I <3 you all to infinity. Y'all have no idea. Especially you, and you, and you, you, and hell maybe even you.

No new lyrics bodes heavily on my heart.

No calls from egg as tibia aka 366 45 71814 aka 514 366 7814. No surprise, nothing to say, nothing to see, keep moving folks, no one died, there's no blood staining the ground. Nothing to see.

Figure that one out.

a l e x i n w o n d e r l a n d

*

How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb

Sources report this is the title of the new U2 album.

As much as I like U2, new albums, and that name, U2's simply not hardcore enough to use a title like that. It should come with a concept album anyhow, with all sorts of advanced science references. You could incorporate physics and chemistry and unbearably skilled music into one awesome, well-designed package to be sold for 18.99 plus tax.

I'll take a break while Dan goes to get a clean pair of pants.

Anyway, I'm over it, I guess. Music is the least of my problems right now. School is getting de-awesome-ified at an alarming rate. I have work. Lots of work. Not = teh cool. Between French, Chemistry and Physics, I could well do very poorly this term. Even with easy Math, [fuck you pre-cal people XP] English, History and Economics working for me. Gym I don't count as actually existing, especially with Mr. Gow at the helm.

Today in English class, after I got 18/20 on the Hamlet test [slacknaaaaaaaaage] Sarah explained to me her pent-up anger. She applied for the A&L position but when she was interviewed they told her from the get-go she wasn't getting the position. She went on about how they were trying to set me and Jin up. No lie. I was cracking up inside. Anyway. Now that I've pissed off all my reading contingent ['cept maybe vanvan because I'm not sure if she cares about my asian thing] I'll move on to something less suckified.

Song of the day is, we'll make it a U2 song to commemorate Bono's monumental album-titling blunder, or rather, monumental album-making blunder, U2 - In a Little While

The opening guitar = o_O w0w.

Anywayss.

My profile hasn't updated lately but I've probably passed the 10,000 word mark on my blog.

A good 1,000 of those words were probably my first blog post. hah.

Um, as you can see, running out of space, nothing to say anymore, getting boringeringer by the minute, I'll take a hint.

*

And in an instant we're all abducted from this mortal coil...

The day the a-bombs fall to the soil.

Came to me randomly just now.

Anywho.

Short post, gotta hit the sack, Chem. test third period tomorrow, no fun X(

Today was fraught with stuff, like many days.

Passed my French test, barely, got by on no lunch, hackied to craptacularity but it was fun as hell, did the same thing in Asshole again in Econ., got 10/10 along with 90% of the class on my Econ. stencil for that matter, had a cool/weird/blah meeting after school but [big pause, Dehui] I got Jin's digits in case we need to contact each other [with emphasis on the contact XP] and Mel said we need to do something radical and never-done-before and I have an idea. Ali didn't like it but then maybe no one else will. It's still in the formative stages so it's pretty malleable.

Other than that, the workload's really starting to set in. Gah. X( I just remembered I have to do my pinhole camera for tomorrow.

Good thing it won't take too long, I hope. I don't want to burn the midnight oil again.

My mom's getting copies of the negative of the BC pic made soon.

I will distribute accordingly.

G'night.

"...all the colours (all grey!) / upon leaving (all grey!) / all will turn to grey..."

AFI - This Celluloid Dream.

Also, piss off. I have to somnole now.

I'll email Henry tomorrow.

*

The blog goes marching in...

Song of the moment: Reel Big Fish - Where Have You Been?

This song has nothing whatsoever to do with me. I've never had an experience like the one in the song, and for all I know I never will. I can't relate to it in any way except it's about girls and depressing, like most pop songs with trumpets [eh, Them? XP] but it's still a fucking awesome song to listen to when I'm down, or when I'm not, I guess. Awesome guitar solos.

Anyway, as for my life, I missed church again. I'm still not sure this is an entirely bad thing because church tends to suck and leave me feeling depressed for some reason, but it's certainly not a good thing because without it my faith atrophies. I did catch Crossroads, though only barely because my shit wasn't straightened out beforehand so I got there about two hours late - missed the barbeque entirely, didn't talk to Nikki at all, and the socializing for the most part felt forced and construed. It was not real real cool and now I'm kinda depressed about the whole thing.

En plus, as if I needed any further proof that I need to get my shit together, I'm still working on my French analyse littéraire at this God-forsaken hour of the morning. That and my back hurts like a bia.

On top of all this crap, I had a talk with Ali last night, who, and I suppose she has a good damn point, feels she's being squeezed out of my life by the sudden appearance of the Breakfast Club, and that because I'm spending time with you guys, I'm spending less with her. She also wants me to have some sort of birthday party, except that for all intents and purposes mine was 16/09/04 at 7:00 in the morning and she wasn't invited.

So. dilemma-city. Dilemmacity, if you will. I don't know what to do.

Anyway, short post because I gotta finish up my French homework.

I'll email Henry [hanrahan!] tomorrow. Maybe I'll give him the url to this dingy place. Easy to keep tabs on me, I guess, I dunno. Whatever. Good night, or morning, depending what time zone you're in and when you read this. Given that, good afternoon and Happy Christmas as well.

*

So, this is my 34th blog post...

And that's significant because it's 33 to the power of 0 and 33 to the power of one added together.

33 / 0 / 33 / 1...

That means Patrick roy is the best goalie of all time, followed closely by Robbie Luongo.

Okay, so you might've noticed the irony in my talking about hockey now that THERE WON'T FUCKING BE ANY THIS SEASON.

I'd like to give a nice little shout out the fucking fucking greedy little fuckers at the NHLPA and the NHL. What about the fans?

Nothing, that's what. They each grab a leg, spread it, and rape us dually.

Fuckers.

Anydangway, what with no hockey this year, I guess I'll not have any CJAD listening to do, which means I don't have to wake up and hear whatever fucking asshole CJAD employed to be not funny in the least every morning around 6 o'clock.

In further somewhat unrelated news, Alex is single with a bullet. If you know of some hot asian chick (white works too, I guess) who is also single and looking, and is awesome in almost every possible way, then hook a brotha up, if you know what I'm saying.

This message brought to you by whatever nerve endings in our brains dictate horniness and loneliness.

I'm still sitting on a gold mine of too-personal-for-you lyrics, and you're still not getting any.

If I were you right now, I'd listen to The Beatles - Here Comes the Sun and absorb its awesomeness through osmosis. It's the only hope you've got to be as awesome as me.

For the sexeiness part, I'd say you should replace your mattress with Victoria's Secret catalogs. Less comfortable, but with that much mass of sexeiness the osmosis will be quicker. Or you could just temporarily incapacitate some hot people and stuff them in your pillowcase or something. That might work, I don't know.

Moving right along into the land of unbearable skilledness, me & teh Danster [danceter!] checked out Collateral yesterday [a few hours ago] and it was, as you could've guessed, unbearably skilled. You should go see it, and absorb its unbearable skilledness. [skidsophrenia!]

Anywho. It seems my crush for Lucy of http://savingxgrace.blogspot.com/ fame has faded into nothingness. This should come as no surprise to the psychologists among you who were aware that I was crushing on her two weeks ago or so.

Here's my CD list:

AFI - Sing the Sorrow (copped)
A Perfect Circle - Thirteenth Step (yet to cop)
Audioslave - Audioslave (copped)
Audioslave - TBA (yet to drop)
NOFX - The War on Errorism (yet to cop)
Rage Against The Machine - Rage Against The Machine (copped)
Rage Against The Machine - Evil Empire (copped)
Rage Against The Machine - The Battle of Los Angeles (copped)
Rage Against The Machine - Renegades (copped)
Tool - Undertow (copped)
Tool - Ænima (copped)
Tool - Lateralus (copped)
Tool - TBA (yet to drop)
U2 - All That You Can't Leave Behind (copped)
U2 - TBA (yet to drop)
Zack de la Rocha - TBA (yet to drop)

As you can see, of the 16, 10 I already own, 2 are available but I haven't bought 'em yet, and 4 haven't released yet.

That's not bad at all.

Rock right on down the highway.

M: I'm sorry.

V: No you aren't.

*

Well, I wrote some decent lyrics for once...

But they're way too personal to post.

So, you get nothing.

Nada.

Well, in the spirit of using foreign languages, I'll leave you the lyrics of Tool - Message to Harry Manback

Message To Harry Manback lyrics


[words in brackets unclear]

Figlio di puttana, sai che tu sei un pezzo di merda? [1]

Hm? You think you're cool, right? Hm? Hm?
When you kicked out people [out of] your house

I tell you this, one of three Americans die of cancer,
you know? Asshole.
You're gonna be one of those.

I [don't have the] courage
to kick your ass directly.
Don't have enough courage for that,
I could, you know.

You know you're gonna have another accident?
You know I'm involved with black magic?
Fuck you. Die. Bastard.
You think you're so cool, hm? Asshole.

And if I ever see your fucking face around,
In Europe or Italy,
Well I'll -- That time I'm gonna kick your ass.
Fuck you. Fucking Americans, Yankee.
You're gonna die outta cancer, I promise.

[Bang bang / Deep pain]

No one does what you did to me.
You wanna know something? Fuck you.
I want your balls smashed, eat shit. Bastard.

Pezzo di merda, figlio di puttana. [2]
I hope somebody in your family dies soon.

Crepa, pezzo di merda, e vai
a sucare cazzi su un aereo! [3]

[1] Son of a bitch, do you know you are a piece of shit?
[2] Piece of shit, son of a bitch.
[3] Die, piece of shit, and go suck dicks on a plane!

Cute, no?

It manages to be really cool, despite being spoken word. I really like how it's spoken, and the background music is pretty cool.

It's not nearly the rockingest song on the album, though.

In other news, yesterday's blog post didn't go over so well.

So, to any and all BC members reading this, I apologize if you feel insulted. I'm not trying to be a jerk. I love you all, and I totally appreciate that you'd do something like this for me. The fact that I didn't totally enjoy it isn't any fault of yours, nor mine really. I just don't like eventful mornings. I can't deal with stuff until about 9 o'clock. And what you did was nothing short of revolutionary in Alex terms - never seen before and highly unlikely to ever be seen again. You rocked my world so hard I couldn't even enjoy myself. I apologize. And I thank you. <3

Furthermore, school is still boraang. Natheeng's happening. I can't wait until the meeting after school on Monday. I'm psyched. And I had a third-person battle with Mel that managed to stay civilized - and I backed down before it got anywhere. Maybe we'll be able to co-exist after all. *fingers crossed*

Ugh, as Zack de la Rocha might say. I got my mail from Encounters with Canada (Ew/C [ewoks!], to those in the know) and I'm going from Nov. 21 to 27. I dunno if I'll be there with anyone from school.

I remember when that was the biggest trouble between me, Them and D, who would go on the Ew/C trip.

Ah, those carefree grade ten days.

I leave you with a bunch of progressively shorter quotes from Township Rebellion that I wrote down in math class.

"...freedom should be fundamental / in johannesburg / or south central..."

"...why stand on a silent platform / fight the war, fuck the norm..."

"...rebel, rebel and yell / cause my people still dwell in hell..."

"...this is a stick-up / our freedom, or ya life..."

"...when ignorance reigns / life is lost..."

Also:

"A good chemist is at least six times as smart as the average Grade 11 student."

But I really meant observant.

Q: Why don'tcha chew on that and smoke it?

A: It's tobacco, you fucker.

*

Well, well, well...

Three holes in the ground, as my maternal grand dad used to say.

And my life right now makes about as much sense as that. Today, as all of you who were paying attention / at my house this morning know, was my birthday.

It was volatile, seemingly of its own volition, and though there were no ninjas, waking up to find people in your living room feels kinda like being raped, except minus the pain in your rectum. Which isn't to say that it wasn't unbearably cool, D. and Them, but that whoa I wasn't ready for that. I'm... very attached to my morning routine. It being my birthday period was hard enough for me to take. And on top of that to have my house crashed by a bunch of maniacs... well, we're right up in the stratosphere now. Now, on to Sandy's birthday... hahaha. I don' think we'll be able to pull off something similar but then we'll see.

The rest of the day more or less plain flat out sucked. It's tough pretending to be happy when people wish you a happy birthday and you just want to lie in bed alone with your music all day.

I can't say the day was without its merits, though. There was the bacon for breakfast, the presents from my relatives, the pizza & fries & wings & pepsi for dinner and pumpkin pie with whipped cream for desert. And the two (2) Tool CDs from my sis were really cool.

As for the constant lingering depression, you'd think it'd just be sexual frustration (see: me as a horny teenage guy - girlfriend to score with = frustrated) but I feel (though I could be mistaken) that it's about a lot more than that. A bit of vagueness and mysteriosity added just for the intellectual tint.

On another down note, Ali was out of commission all week and won't be at school tomorrow. When she gets sick, she gets SICK and I really miss her... I mean I haven't seen her outside of school (random meeting at Vendome aside) since before school started and now I'm not seeing her at school either. She did have the presence of mind to wish me a happy birthday yesterday though.

All in all, bleh.

NOFX - American Errorist (I Hate Hate Haters)

Rock, rock on.

*

So, aight, well, today kinda sucked...

Depression was back in semi-full force, so yeah my life lately has been getting less & less enjoyable (****SUICIDE WARNING W00P W00P****) and it's only going to get worse when we start actually working at school, though I must say I'm glad that we've had a longer reprieve from full-fledged school workloads than usual this year.

Aaanyway, things on the um (pick a front) front are not going anywhere. You'd think maybe this would incite me to do something, eh, Them, huh, huh? Well obviously not, it only crushes my soul a little further. (at this point my boo hoo guru makes fun of me for being such a teenager or something like that. XP it's all love satchel) I'm listening to Sum 41 and my heart it bleeds napalm (****THE ST00GES REFERENCE****) and no good lyrics lately.

Tomorrow, I'm going to wake up, and I'll be 16, barring a time-freeze ala Help! I'm stuck on the first day of school! book or my heart randomly stopping in the night (or a ninja attack, eh, Them?) and jack shit will be different. Birthdays are so full of shit. I get disappointed when my consumer whorish needs aren't met so I take on a magnanimous (XP) attitude and say I don't want anything, it's no big deal, and you know what I realized, it really freaking isn't. The big changes never have anything to do with your birthday, except maybe your 18th, they take place when you grow as a person, not as a number, so I resent the whole make-belief parade that birthday parties are, but I put up with my family because they'd be all disappointed if I didn't acknowledge that tomorrow is a speshul day.

Barf.

In the mean time, I dunno, listen to Rage Against the Machine - Bombtrack.

*

So I was bored...

Bands // Song Titles
Created by BourdiezFreak and taken 10840 times on bzoink!
Choose a band/or artist and answer only in song TITLES by that band:	Tool
Are you female or male:	Jimmy
Describe yourself:	Lateralus
How do some people feel about you:	Schism
How do you feel about yourself:	The Grudge
Describe your ex girlfriend/boyfriend:	The Patient
Describe your current girlfriend/boyfriend:	Faaip de Oiad
Describe where you want to be:	Hooker with a Penis
Describe what you want to be:	Forty-Six & Two
Describe how you live:	Disposition
Describe how you love:	Prison Sex
Share a few words of wisdom:	Hush
Create a Survey | Search Surveys | Go to bzoink!

A&L

So, after the horror that was yesterday and my blowing it out of proportion, today was much better in that not only did I miss my last two classes prefecting and doing nothing, respectively, I also got the Arts & Lit. position with Jinsun, and I did really well on my summer reading test (29/30)... and Prachar didn't count the verb test. That was a definite bonus. Today, a whole new problem presents itself: Team Canada neeeeeeds to beat Finland. I... we... us... can't lose to the Finns, for crying out loud. I think. Was that racist?

Anyway, in remembrance of 11/09/01, we watched In Memoriam New York City today in Economics class. It was insane. What an impact that had... seeing the planes crash up close, watching the towers collapse with a soundtrack of screams, watching bodies tumble from high in the tower to the ground. Sickening.

At the same time, it was interesting to see people being interviewed while obviously enraged at the attacks. I remembered thinking, a few times, how they totally couldn't see the other side of things - but that's not surprising and I don't blame them. Emotions... well, it was an incredible, unbearably skilled piece of film-making. I had forgotten, or maybe never really realized, just how horrible the day was... it really blew me away the level of fear and at the same time human spirit were prevalent. It's really beautiful to see human beings upping the moral ante in times of crisis. Selflessness is really an awesome thing to see.

In other news, I seem to be really at odds with my family today. I'm not sure if it's them or if it's me but things are not clicking.

If you haven't heard it lately, go listen to NOFX - The Decline.

Amazing song.

*

Fuck it.

Today was a perfect example of a few of the things that are wrong with Alex.

1) He's unable to cross certain boundaries, to put himself in certain positions in which he refuses to be. Case in point, I hate the awkwardness that arises when other people won't fucking keep to themselves and shut the fuck up. Nobody's really sure of themselves and you can cut the idiocy of the situation with a knife. Everyone has to pretend that they don't mind this stranger isn't respecting the unwritten rules of society.

2) Once something like that has started, and I refuse to sit at the back of the bus and pretend while the fucker acts like a bull in a china shop, I can't show the other people on the bus that I'm weak, I can't explain why I didn't sit with you. So at that point I have to stay at the middle of the bus for the whole ride.

3) Once it's over, I realize what an idiot I'm being and I get really depressed, and I'm in a bad mood for the next few hours.

It's not cool.

Fucking ugh.

Not to mention it ruined a perfectly good day where it was only a half-day, I did well on the French homework and I might've passed the test, I had my iPod, everything was going smooth, and then some idiot on the bus fucks me up and I finish the job for him.

Fuck.

Shit like that totally makes me depressed. I can't just brush it off like other people, I refuse to put up with it and it makes me look like an anti-social idiot instead of a person with limits, like everyone else. They're strange limits, yeah, but they're biggies and I react very badly when I'm in a situation like that. It's happened before and it always makes me look bad. I just... can't.

In the spirit of having to get some emotional pain off my chest,

Pushed - (Not Infinity Minus One)

--------------------------------------

I'm sorry but now I guess it
Looks like I'm an asshole again

I have my boundaries, I'm not willing to go there
If that makes me look like an idiot,
Then so be it.
And now it looks like I'm an asshole again.
I'm sorry if you can't accept the way I am
But don't label me an asshole because
I have boundaries I don't cross
I don't cross

I'm sorry but now I guess it
Looks like I'm an asshole again
Looks like I'm an asshole again
Looks like I'm an asshole again
Looks like I'm an asshole again
I'm sorry but now I guess it
Looks like I'm an asshole again
Looks like I'm an asshole again

Don't try to force me across the line
Stopping where I stop is my choice
Don't tell me not to raise my voice
Don't try to force me across the line

I'm sorry...

--------------------------------------

No rockin' at all,

*

Ahh... sleepy, sleepy Sundays,

awash in a sea of social politics that's threatening to pull me under.

Life is cute, in a "Nice try, buster, but no cigar." kinda way.

It gets annoying after a while.

Of course, I'm probably expecting too much because I grew up so insulated.

On the, um, Western front, nothing much's happening. I slept through until the afternoon again, thereby missing church for the nth time. I should really stop going to bed around 4.

One thing that really irritates me about myself is that I'm rarely sure of anything, especially in the social field. I'm constantly second guessing myself in terms of how I act and react, and trying to guess what people are thinking. I usually end up taking these invented thoughts too far and then do something rash. It's really fucking annoying. Like I said, social politics.

On other sides, no lyrics lately, I'm suffering from a blockage or something, and things could go anywhere from here school-wise.

Down-birthday-to-count: 3.5 (counting the rest of today)

Arts & Lit. position, you gonna be my bitch.

"...yeah you're trying to tire me, tire me / i can see you in front of me / you're tring to tire me, tire me / why don't you get from in front of me..."

I'm rollin' mad Podded-up...

iPodded up, that is.

Regardless of the fact that today's not my birthday, my mom graciously allowed me to open and start using my iPod.

iRock, to quote muscle ( http://muscle68.blogspot.com )

So I came over to Them's place listening to Tool, Jay-Z, Rage, APC, Minor Threat, U2 et al.

It was sweet.

Also, Canada kicks motherfucking ass. 'Nough said.

This post is going to bring down my average of words per post but I'll make up for it sooner or later.

Rock, rock on.

*

Man this shit is aural fucking crack...

Dan, or should I say, *cough* Them *cough*, you are going to get ya socks rocked off tomorrow. I love this freaking CD. And Township Rebellion, the only Rage song from their four CDs I had yet to hear really impressed me.

As for today... I managed to survive without getting too stressed out or in trouble or anything. Also, the whole yearbook interview debacle was the most fun I'd had in a while... that joke killed it, man oh man, Dan, if I get the position now, I'll buy you a La-Z-Boy or something that you can sit on in homeroom... fuck, I'll outfit it with a motor and wheels so you can ride to your classes in comfort & speed. Going down stairs just got twenty-one times funner! [Ed.'s note: I know that's not a word.] I'm not sure how going up stairs would work though.

I got PhotoShop 7 up and running on my computer again last night (this morning) and I made this during my free time; if Bush gets re-elected, this will be my picture in the yearbook: [Ed.'s note: Picture coming soon.]

*updated with my photoshop wizardry: http://pages.total.net/~halfman/Postar.jpg *

Speaking of which, I realized that that gives me a reason to want him to be re-elected, which is a bad thing. Can you say conflict of interest?

I can.

Conflict of interest.

Heh. That was so lame.

To make up for it,

"A seal walks into a club.

Ow."

and anyone who knows the joke, though I'm not going to write it all down, but they'll get this. [Ed.'s note: I know that was poor syntax, shut up.]

"[unintelligible crap replete with arm-waving]

Shut up, Fridge!"

Man, that joke was killer.

Anywho, I have a weekend to attend to. And a .jpg to get hosted.

So I'll blog for y'all later.

Rock on right out...

"...why stand on a silent platform? / fight the war, fuck the norm..."

Dan doesn't get why this is both my lyric for the day and my MSN name but when he hears the song, he'll get it.

It's a fucking rocking song.

And that's the most fucking rocking part.

Rage Against The Machine - Township Rebellion

Get your hands on it somehow.

*

Now that's a successful business venture if I ever saw one...

So the Cheap Thrills episode produced one (1) CD, Rage Against The Machine's Rage Against The Machine, and a loss of four (4) dollars and thirty (30) cents.

It did, however, subtract from my possession the abomination that is Radiohead's Hail to the Thief.

Now I can be awesome and headbangin' instead of trendy and bleeding in both ears.

"...war is born / fight the war, fuck the norm..."

Rock, rock on.

*

Who let this cowboy on the saddle? / He don't know a missile from a gavel...

Or, in this case, anything at all about my reasons for the course change.

The person in question is Mr. "You Gonna Get Raped" Vamvakas...

And, as you can tell, no Pre-Cal.

I'll live, maybe, I guess.

Whatever.

I was in too much of a state to do the Arts & Lit. interview so I'm going to do it tomorrow. With any luck I'll get the job-izzle.

Moving right along, today was okay, friend-wise, I guess. Rowshyra said she liked Tool. That really threw me off. It's just.. so... weird... Kind of a whodathunkit, if you will.

The rain was dreary but I survived.

When dad gets back from work, he might have new CDs for me... he went to Cheap Thrills today to see if he could trade/sell a whole pack of CDs that I no longer care for. I doubt they'll take 'em all but I might get some cash/credit/music so no point in not trying.

As we speak, I have no homework.

And I'm listening to NOFX.

"...and now I can't sleep from years of apathy / all because I read a little noam chomsky..."

Canada crushed the Slovaks.

Elliot was at school today, though, so I lost my bet with myself that he'd commit suicide.

Enh.

It really pisses me off how un-international the tournament is. It's so Canada-USA centred. Two teams (Russia and Slovakia) never played a single home game, and between our two countries there have so far been 8 games. I see why they would do a two-division thing, but North America and Europe makes no sense. Canada, USA, and the two most eastern European countries as one division would work much better. Not to mention all the final three games are in North America, and it's set-up so that Canada and the USA can meet in the Final (television ratings, anyone?) so that kinda planning makes me fucking jaded about the world, especially with no NHL season in the near future.

Ugh.

*

It never ceases to amaze me...

...how I can forget just how fucking good Mars bars are.

I never forget to the point of not buying them again because I remember, somewhere deep in my subconscious, that they rock my multicoloured stomach contents.

But as soon as I start chompin' down on one, BOOM!

The awesomeness hits me smack across the face like an embarrassed Dehui, or maybe an enraged Koj.

They're like chocolate-covered crack.

Anyway. Today was not cool.

Because what with Mrs. G-dizzle being hot, and probably only because she rapes every other girl teacher in terms of looks (though I kinda agree with Myhr that Liscio is up there), so she looks better in comparison, and I was desperately waiting for maybe an itsy-bitsy signal of a hint of a course fucking change sheet, so yeah I ended up having a not good homeroom.

Also, McDoug told me she switched me out of her English class.

Fucking twit.

Gagh.

My only chance... ruined.

Anyway, Go Team Canada.

Um... song for today...

"...count bodies like sheep to the rhythm of the war drums..."

Don't fuck the dead, fuck the sleeping! Less of a social stigma and they might wake up and start participating!

So if you're a psychoanalist, a psychiatrist, a psychologist, or just a seer, then you might have realized that I'm extra-hormonal right now.

So, don't offer me any sexual favours unless you plan on fucking carrying through, bitch!

*Never mind. That never happened.

And we'll see what happens on the Arts & Lit. front. I want that thing so bad but with Mel heading the project... whatever.

Lyrics fail me.

H a l e x t o s i s

*

Open your eyes / look up to the skies and see...

I'm just a poor boy (poor boy) I need no sympathy because I'm easy come, easy go, little high, little low...

w00t Bohemian Rhapsody.

Anywho.

School was decent.

I really should be working on my History project right now.

If I'm not back this time tomorrow, carry on, carry on...

Also, American Pie by Don McLean is the shitz0rz.

\m/ o(-_-)o \m/

*insert guitar solo here*

So the Czechs killed Sweden, and the US is raping Russia right now.

fUx0rZ.

Ugh.

Anyway, so I'm still hormonal to tha extreme.

D/l "March of Death" by Zack de la Rocha if you have the time and/or you like hip-hop/scratching/RATM/the political left in any way, shape or form.

It's pretty good.

Um, kinda uneventful blog. The clock is ticking until my 16th birthday (9 days) so make sure you enh never mind I can't do that. But yeah it'd be nice if you remembered.

So, if I've missed anything, remember this:

Listen to the following songs:

Run DMC - It's Tricky
Audioslave - Light My Way
Zack de la Rocha - March of Death
A Perfect Circle - The Noose
Don McLean - American Pie
Queen - Bohemian Rhapsody
Sum 41 - We're All to Blame

That more or less sums it up.

"... and not to pull your halo down / around your neck and tug you to the ground / but I'm more than just a little curious / how you're planning to go about making your amends / to the dead..."

Rock on Team Canada '04.

*

Back in Black...

Actually, more like back in a white Zoo York tee and some navy Ecko jeans, but that's irrelevant. The point is, I'm back, and I rock.

I got (big w00t) two (2) comments on my last blog post.

Now that deserves a big 56 if I ever saw a blog post that got two comments deserve a big 56.

BIG 56

Not too big, but eh. It's only two comments.

Anywho. I was in Ontario all weekend, I got to eat a lot of junk food, and I got paid 60 bucks for helping my uncle & aunt move into their new place instead of watching Canada beat Russia.

I did get to watch Russia beat Slowvakia the next day though.

Speaking of which, if any one that reads my blog is nice, kind, benevolent, and really, really stinking rich, there's something I'd like for my birthday... They're auctioning off game-worn jerseys of WCH players starting Sept. 10th and end Sept. 17th and I would orgasm on the spot if I got the Alexei Kovalev one (in keeping with a) my NHL team affiliaton (Montreal) and b) my nickname (Sexei Alexei)) so you can see why I want one so bad.

Anyway, no new music right now. I gotta go to bed.

*

4 down, 178 to go...

School days, that is.

Course change sheet was handed in today.

Now it's out of my hands.

It's all yours, G-Dizzle.

You know what to do.

On a less spiritual note, who the fuck does Jeff H. think he is?

I mean, he had two of the top five hottest girls in the school competing for his love.

I would kill for that kind of problem...

Yeesh.

But, as Satchmo, aka Sachi, aka STM, aka my boo hoo guru, has and will probably say again, I'm too obsessed with hot girls.

This is probably the case.

But it begs the question: Isn't that normal at this age?

Anyway.

I'll live.

Now, yesterday I promised the top 15 Tool songs, so here they are:

1) Lateralus
2) The Grudge
3) No Quarter*
4) Prison Sex
5) Schism
6) Forty-Six & Two
7) Stinkfist
8) Undertow
9) The Patient
10) Eulogy
11) Ticks & Leeches
12) Disposition
13) Revolution**
14) Parabol/Parabola
15) Eon Blue Apocalypse

* Led Zeppelin cover
** Unreleased track with RATM

Also, listen to Light My Way - Audioslave. You'll thank me later.

And, I was dubbed, jointly by myself and Dehui, as "Sexei Alexei" today. You need to genuflect when you come into the same room as me now.

Keep on tranglin' like Larry Pat.

*

Amerizan

Well here's a nice friendly message to tha GOP
And here's a nice friendly message to GWB
Here's a nice friendly message to tha,
Well, here's a nice friendly message to tha GOP

Here's a nice friendly message to tha,
Here's a nice friendly message to tha,
Here's a nice friendly message to tha,
Well, here's a nice friendly message to tha enemy!

Yo tha A to the M to tha E to tha R
Now tha I to tha Z to tha A to tha N,
Yeah, now flip those last four letters
Now doesn't that spell American?

'Cause you're Amerizan cops,
Don't try to hide ya swastika
'Cause my words will find ya,
Comin' straight from tha speaker

Well, here's a nice friendly message to tha,
Yeah, here's a nice friendly message to tha,
Well, here's a nice friendly message to tha enemy!

It goes something,
It goes a little something,
It goes a little something like this:

Fuck tha police, comin' straight from the bottom rung
A white singer got it bad 'cause I'm young
And I'm a commie pinko so police think
They have tha authority to arrest a protester

Yo tha A to the M to tha E to tha R
Now tha I to tha Z to tha A to tha N,
Yeah, now flip those last four letters
Now doesn't that spell American?

'Cause you're Amerizan pigs
Don't try to hide ya swastikas
'Cause my words will find ya,
Blastin' live from tha speaker

Fuck tha police, comin' straight from the bottom rung
A punk rocker got it bad 'cause I'm young
And I'm counter-cultural so police think
They have tha authority to arrest a protester

Racist fuckers who'd beat kike or a dyke:
Fuck you all, watch me pull tha pin from this mic!
Racists fuckers who'd kill a negro, church-bound:
Know that I hold a detonator unwound!

Fuck tha police, comin' straight from the bottom rung
A dissenter got it bad 'cause I'm young
And I live differently so police think
They have tha authority to arrest a protester

Yeah, so fuck tha police!
Fuck tha GOP and fuck GWB
Fuck your white walls and systems,
'Cause you fuckers won't get me!
You won't get me!
Nah, you won't get me!
Nah, you won't get me!

So fuck tha police, coming straight from tha ghetto slums
Peaceful protest but, oh, here the rubber bullets come
Now we ain't got time ta hide, ain't got time ta run
Now we caught up in a frenzied, bloody scrum
And here tha men come with they shields and they guns
Slanging tear gas, coughin' up both of our lungs
And on tha men come with they shields and they guns
Well I got a message for ya: we ain't gonna run!

So fuck tha police, comin' straight from the bottom rung
A white singer got it bad 'cause I'm young
And I'm Un-American so police think
They have tha authority to arrest a protester

Yo tha A to the M to tha E to tha R
Now tha I to tha Z to tha A to tha N,
Yeah, now flip those last four letters
I think that spells American...

I'm not a perfect person...

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Another day, another outlook...

Meaning, things look less crappy. I got my iMac back, finished my summer reading, French test over, etc.

I have three gripes right now, none of which are as bad as yesterday. But.

1) MSN's not working. This is pissing me off like hell. MSN maintains that neither of my email addresses exist, despite the fact that I can log into .NET passport with both. Yeesh.

2) I'm not in Pre-Cal. Math 536 is so boring that it's physically painful. God willing I'll be able to switch out.

3) If I do manage to switch out, it'll disrupt the rest of my schedule... to what extent I'm not sure but either way I like it the way it is. If I have to decide between Pre-Cal and a decent rest of the schedule, I don't know what I'll do.

Anywho.

"...now how you gonna get what you need ta get? / tha gut-eaters, blood-drenched, get offensive like tet..."

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